I don't know what I'm in love with anymore; you or the memories.

YIPEE! There's pictures today! Zilian on mummy iPhone before she left for Hongkong. Was talking over the phone with Marhuimin & Mandy last night. Funniest part is, Mandy thought we said Chinatown when we said Clarke Quay. ADORABLE LAH SHE. Next.. School today... 

First period was History, i was sleeping through it but before that half of the lesson i'm not in class. Hehe. I went down popular to get school socks. :/ As an excuse of course, who wants to stuck in the freaking class for History. Boring lesson ever. -.- But it happen that Tomato teacher very good today he let me sleep and asked if i understand what he's teaching. I said, Yep and i promise him i'll score better grades for my CA1. Not going to play anymore . :) 

Next period was Social Studies, i was basically, playing and not doing my assignment at all. :/ Told Mdm Seh i'm not feeling well and she let me sleep. I swear today lesson damn slack and shiok. Hehe. Cause i'm sleeping for almost every single lesson because all the teacher eat wrong medicine let me sleep. HAHAHAHA. After that, got prepared for PE. I was dreading PE to come because it's 2.4. FREAKING 2.4 horh! So while changing, i basically have to drag myself out of the class. :/ 

PE. This is the fucking first time in my life i completed my 2.4 run. :/ Plus walking & cheating of course. I never once..... complete okay. So somehow, i improved. Mr Chew also kinda happy also cause i keep pouting and give him the sad face. :/ HAHAHA. Recess, didn't ate cause kinda no appetite. & we went back to class and dry our hair, cause it's wet. LOL. Saw Joel Zhang freezing so i gave him my jacket and he look so warm inside. THANKS TO MY LEOPARD JACKET. :) After that was Physics lesson, i thought there was a class test so i hide in the toilet and nua on the floor. SERIOUSLY MY CLASS TOILET THE FLOOR DAMN NICE TO NUA. Maybe because the aunty just clean the toilet & it felt so clean that i just sat there. :/ 

Physics lesson damn funny. I damn KP & high no idea why. :/ I keep spot Mr Ng mistake and he got so fed-up and asked me go and do on the board. My class guys having fun with my jacket because of the hoodie and they act like they are boxer. Typical mad guys. OHYA. MANY PEOPLE GAVE SCHOOL A MISS TODAY. Then i got punished to face the wall CAUSE he don't like my laughter. WHAT THE HELL RIGHT. :/ Mr Ng was sick so the way he talk is super funny that me and hanxue kept laughing. NON-STOP.  

After that was nua-ing at canteen because i don't know where to go! I'm still considering if i should got d&t or just go home and sleep or study with that idiot. I DONT KNOW LA. SOOOOO, In the end i went to Ngee Ann poly. Kinda regret that i went there because... It's hell boring, i slept at the seminar. Didn't learn anything at all. No joke. Plus go already reach home so late. I DON'T LIKE. Went back to school hoping to see her but nope, didn't. Nevermind. At that point of time, my phone battery was flat, so imagine how bored i was. Reached home charge saw my whatsapp, i laughed like siao. Because... HAHHA. NEVERMIND. Currently whatsapp-ing Nicole & Mary. Jeez. Should i go sembawang now? :( Chew wants me to go but i'm so lazy to go ley! :( Shall see how later! That's all for today! Goodbye! Will be here tomorrow with pictures! :> 

Love allows you to see the good in a person, even when no one else does.

Uhmmm, No pictures again. Sorry. But today main point is i'm going to blog about Mandy. Before that shall talk about school?

Super love Miss Yong reaction when she saw me back in school. I think she's the best teacher man. HAHA. Wasn't really feeling very well the whole day, but certain period of time, i'm like a normal girl or can say i look perfectly normal and not sick at all. But in actual fact, i'm very sick. I'm literally freezing in class, i almost vomitted in the toilet till i collapsed on the toilet floor sitting down there crying. My friends knew? Nope. All they see is me being perfectly normal. Nevermind. I still got so high that i went around playing with the guys. Example. Pong. Haha. Marhuimin wasn't at class today because she has match. I miss her. No joke. :'(

Alright about Mandy now,
I guess i got so used to having her beside me? Like at most she's only gone for 3-4 hours and i could be able to see her. But for yesterday, after like only 13 hours later i saw her. That fucked up feeling that i couldn't see her and hug her to sleep. Very killing you know? :/ Somehow, i've no idea what kind of friendship or can say what kind of relationship we are right now. We behave like couple when nobody's around. When there's people we behave like normal friend, but smart people would know sometimes wrong with us. HA-HA. We're freaking once enemy and now we're like friends. Weird for me to fall for you. I guess, it's difficult for me to treat you back as friend because right now. All i can say is, i love you. Yes, i love you so much, Bryan asked me if everything is worth it, & i said. Seeing you smile after everything, it will be worth it.

I cried to sleep last night, i think i would be crying to sleep almost every night till you're back beside me. So yep. That's all for today. :/ Goodbye. Excited for school tomorrow? Kinda~ But i don't feel like going to the Ngee Ann poly thingy. :( I'm currently niaming to Celeste about Mandy. Ohya, we're okay already. Our arguments never last more than 24 hours. :)

Reality is the mirror of your thoughts, choose wisely what you put in front of your mirror.

No pictures again. Ultra sorry. :'(

Something happen last night. I was so worried about mand I woke up found her not in the room. I panic, i searched high and low for the keys. Went down, almost cried out because i couldn't find her. I was really really really very worried. You've no idea how it felt, I'm so afraid she would like jump down the building or something. In the end found her, Asked her not to cry but she still did, in the end. She back faced me. That was the time, i broke into tears. I feel so useless not being able to cheer her up, not being able to make her stop crying. So i walked away as she noticed that i'm crying. I cried out and she came beside me and gave me a hug. & blablabla. That's all. Went home and both of us fell asleep.

Woke up at 6 plus but went back to sleep because both of us couldn't drag ourself out of the bed. So we decided to give school a miss. Marhuimin came over to my place at woke me and mand up. Went to CB mac and had breakfast. I ate the slowest. No idea why. Then plan to like slack slack near my block but i mood-swing uh. Walked home and leave both of them. HAHAHA. Few minutes later they called me. :/ Went down with mandy specs. And started nua-ing downstairs. No idea where to go. :( In the end, all of them decided to accompany me go airport fetch my mum. Sweet of them. :) Went back to school to grab my file. Really very awkward though because.... me and celeste not really at a good state right now. :(

But went in to school and everybody reaction when they saw me was really big. NO JOKE. Accompanied MARHUIMIN to go to canteen while me and mandy went to BBT and slack. Decided to come over my place. Studied together, I cried and she SOMEHOW comfort me. AGAIN. & She said i cried everyday. -.- Send her off just now and she gave me a goodbye hug. DIDN'T EXPECT IT OKAY. I really love the four days with her. :) LIKE SERIOUSLY, I'm the happiest girl in my life. But i don't know for her lah. HAHAHA. I seriously need to go to school tomorrow. NO JOKE. Have been skipping for like days already :/

Shine like stars, burning brightly for a moment in everlasting eternity.

Pure word entry cause no pictures. I'll go to the point. Didn't went school today partly because of my cramp & partly because i overslept. Chew was kinda not happy because i didn't go school. :/ Sleep till like afternoon plus & Poyin came. She had her tuition while i did my own stuffs. Went to see doctor and went around my area to find for what i need, but don't have the brand i want :@ So went home instead. Bump into Jin feng, Jin hong & some seniors. All at different timing? Suay or what. LOL. Basically that's what i did today. I have to go to school tomorrow. :(

Mummy coming back from Malaysia tomorrow. So not excited for it, though she's in singapore for two days only. Mummy birthday coming also & i haven get anything for her yet. :/ I was really drunk last night till i don't know what did i say. I think confirm something stupid and ridiculous. :( I seriously love doing stupid stuffs when i'm drunk, so i guess next time cannot drink with my boyfriend/girlfriend. I will embarrass myself. LOL. Uhm, super love the time with that person the past few days. 4 days straight? Awesome or what? Hehe. Be jealous people. Joking. That's all for today. Goodbye.

I think she saw i blogged that i study with her. But gosh, we're just studying only nothing much. Plus we didn't really talk because i'm sleeping and she's doing. At least study with someone is better than studying alone? Plus i've no idea where i want to go also. OKAY THAT'S ALL. I really don't want to see they quarrel eh. :/ Will damn guilty. *NOJOKE* & FYI, i already moved on. :)

I do still love you. But that doesn't matter to you anymore. Right?

Shall blog today. Sorry for not blogging for the past few days. Busy & lazy i guess. :) Shall use tumblr pictures for today. Because i've no idea where's my memory card for my camera. :) Today's theme would all be LESBIAN. Because i find LESBIAN very hot. (Y) I shall start by saying what happen on Friday.

Friday. 
If i didn't remember wrongly, nothing much happen in school just that during PE class we girls got high and started drawing on our PE PANTS with chalk. >< BASICALLY, That's the most exciting thing happen in school that day. LOL. Afterall, it's friday. Had d&t after school. Went to catch a movie with Poyin. Meet her at hub, But i cabbed to school with some of my class guys. SUNBIAN MAH. Pangseh them. HEHE. We watch We Not Naughty. Gosh, i cried eh. I find it damn touching. :'( AND i did laugh of course. Bump into Daren and clique after the movie. Went home after movie, that's all for that day :) I SKIPPED TUITION THAT DAY. :>

Saturday.

I was supposed to reach Batok at 7 in the morning but i overslept, He also overslept, so we met in the afternoon instead. LOL. But in the morning was basically talking over the phone with AHCHEW. I wore my " Cheetah " jacket out that day. GOSH. I all the while thought is leopard but after closer look and investigating it. I think it looks more like cheetah prints than leopard prints. BUT STILL, i love that jacket ALOT. <3 The first thing he say when he saw me was " OMG, WHERE YOU GET YOUR JACKET I WANT. " Haha. He said that okay. A GUY SAID THAT. Went to church after meeting him, i didn't intend to go because i'm very tired but i still drag myself to go because of MARY & TWINNEH. Everybody love hugging me that day because i'm so soft and nice to hug. WRONG. Is my jacket! HAHAHA. Didn't stayed for cell because phone battery running out & i never regret not staying for cell. HAHAHA. After that, friend came over and drink and stuffs and collapse at 5plus in the morning. 

Sunday.

Friend was at my place for almost the whole day. We watched Human Centipede 2 together. AWESOME SHOW. I bet my friend going to say i'm mad for rating the show 9/10 when the rating on funshion is like 5/10. I just find this show INTERESTING, i'm not like that RETARDED guy doing pervertic and retarded stuffs. Basically, that's how my sunday was spend. :'( 

Today.

Woke up late because..... HAHAHAH. SECRET. Wanted to cab go school but no cab. Wanted to bus go school but no bus. IN THE END, we went to CB mac and sleep at CB mac till i bump into my aunty and i freaked out. Lucky she didn't see me. Marhuimin called few minutes after i left CB mac. She asked me to dabao HARSHBROWN for them. Gosh, thanks to them my bag still stink of harshbrown! Nevermind. Bused to school. Bump into Mr Koh and he said that i've to run 40 rounds. I almost fainted hearing that but nevermind in the end i also didn't run 40 rounds. HEHEHE. Basically, that's all. MARHUIMIN crazy want sia. She eat harshbrown in the toilet out of so many place in the school. OHGOSH.  Went to class because GOODGIRL. No lah, cause we have nowhere to go so we go class lorh~ Recess was alright though nothing much happen. I slept through maths because my cramp is killing me. Mrs Yeo let me sleep. HAPPYDIE. Went to find Mr Koh and he punished me to sit there till 6 ( that's what he said at first ) but after i went to canteen and went up and find him again he just said okay la till 3 will do. I'M SUPER HAPPY OKAY. He release me at 3 plus cause DM keep walking out and in. Didn't settle down :@ Had one to one remedial with LIMINGZHU. Best teacher ever okay. After that i planned to go hub with CASSAN but the bus not here yet and actually i don't really want to go to hub also. Went back to school because somehow someone wanted to study with me. HAHAHAHAH. In the end, she was studying. I'm sleeping. JOKING LA. I did studied. A LITTLE. Better than nothing what. I think Valda was somehow shocked to see both of us studying together is like... how the fuck can we be friends. HAHAHA. It's a very difficult think to have someone you love so much to be your friend. BUT IT TAKES TIME. :) I think one day she would be able to do what i'm doing now. :') Went home about 5 plus because i thought i'm going to have tuition but in the end, i pon tuition because my cramp is killing me. :( Basically, that's all for today. Busy day but i like. :D 

It hurts the most when the person who made you feel so special yesterday makes you feel so unwanted today.

I really love today a lot a lot. Let me brief you what happen. Hehehe. <3 Woke up in the morning smiling to myself because i saw something which makes me really really very happy. It happen that today i somehow went school earlier than normal days and happen to saw her in the morning. But i doubt she saw me. NEVERMIND, cause that's not the point. But what really spoil my day is i saw those bunch of sluts outside school :) Came in school and niam to Celeste and Cassan. :) After that was D&T, we didn't use the computer lab today because the express took it :@ So we use the tech room which equals. NO AIR-CON. Effing hot. :(

After that was SS and i slept. And Recess, i was hunting for calculator cause i've to use it during Maths lesson and the class test during remedial. Asked " HIM " to ask YX for me. " HIM " don't seems to get it and he's so blur. GOSH. " HIM " went to tell YX that i'm finding for him i guess. GOSH. And he's so KP also lorh. I ask him if he has calculator. He say HAVE.... *few seconds later* At home. :@ So feel like killing him. Ohwell, i wouldn't bare too. :x After that went up to third level and start finding for calculator :@ AND i asked her. I bet she was shocked i would talk to her, but ohwell, i still did in the end. That's all that matters. & i lend my calculator from MARY instead, so somehow, she save the day! <3 

After Maths was, CF, but CF nothing much happen. After CF was english. That's the funniest thing on earth. <3 We were like skipping chinese class, got caught red-handed. Got nagged by the whoever, instead of LiMingZhu scolding. He just told us not to do it again because me and CHEW are forever late. Promised him that we wouldn't anymore. WHAT A LIE. But i sang the " Barney Song " because it happen that i don't know that slut's friend seems to like Barney and i happen to saw the bag hanging a barney. Kinda upset when i ask YX did he heard me singing, he said no :( So effort wasted. JEEZ. After that was Maths Remedial, did our class test and we could go! YEAH! :D

( The happy moment starts now.. ) 

* I can't say the name out so i will name the guy " A " and the girl " B " *

Met up with " A " outside school, and we came to a conclusion on where to go when " B " arrives. We bused to my house. We planned to like go to CB mac to nua once i charge my phone till like 50 percent. But in the end, we nua till like 5 plus and we only went out of house to go hub to meet up with Sean Chua. We walked to hub okay, don't play play. JOKING. I was hell awkward because i'm somehow the " light bulb " so i talked on the phone with someone. :) Reached where Sean Chua was waiting. GOSH, he changed so much :( He got tanner and somehow.. more mature. So not like him :( I treated him drinks while " A " went to get food cause he has been complaining he's hungry from my house. So he got food. What's worst, Me & " B " kept quarreling non-stop. In the end, all of us play the SHUT UP game. Cause i keep asking " A " to shut up. In the end, " A " lost and all of us laughed. He pestered to go hub and so we agreed. Sean Chua effing funny and joker, we walked to whole hub within 15 minutes, HOW AWESOME. & we're super random and start talking about BRA. I tell you hub is the worst place to slack, maybe because i stay near hub. :x Even though, me & sean didn't really talk today, but you know i finally understood the feeling of meeting up with someone who you didn't contact for a period of time. That feeling is like.. (Y) Okay. Enough about that, Sean Chua left at 7.30 cause he's meeting up with his other friend. :x 

Sooooooooo, I trained to sembawang with " A " & " B ". In the end " A " & I cabbed home. He's such a gentleman, he paid for the cab fee. But i don't wanna bully him so gave him like 5 dollars. OKAY, BETTER THAN NOTHING RIGHT. Bused home today, normally i would take like the U-turn la. But today i need the toilet badly :( So i crossed the road like how i always do, this time round, i almost got hit by a car, i freaking saw the car so far away eh and he horn me wtf, and he say " You want die isit " GRR. Hate drivers like them :@ Reached home about 9 :) GOODGIRL96. I wanted to like drink tonight.. Maybe i should :) See how later lorh. :D 

I'm happy today because...

1. I can finally see Sean Chua

2. I finally bond my friendship with " B "

3. I got to know more about " HIM "

4. Didn't quarrel with her today :D HAHAHAHA.

5. Mummy's not in Singapore.

& many more.......

Gosh, there's a mad lady shouting across the blocks. She's so loud. I wonder what's happening. Either, her children doesn't want to listen to her or the husband want a divorce. Cause what me and Bryan heard was " 你不可以这样对我。" & " 你现在到底在哪里？" Hehe. I know me and Bryan very busybody. Gosh i'm blogging so late today. Sorry! My readers drop like siao, cause i change my link :( SAD YOU KNOW. Nevermind. Bryan ask me something funny 

Bryan : Rachel, why you change your blog link? 

Me : Cause have a lot of haters lorh 

Bryan : Then what do you normally blog?  

Me : My feelings, what happen in school & sometimes bitch about people 

Bryan : Wah, i didn't know my sister so bitchy.

Me : EVIL SMILE.

You know i won't expect any of my current readers to read like every single word i write, i guess i've to stop blogging a wordy post from today. Anyway, that's all for today because i'm going to skype with mummy now. Goodbye. :')

To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but dream, not only plan, but also believe.

School today was somehow excited, somehow boring. Shall not say out what happen period by period, i shall just say what's those exciting stuffs that happen in school today :)

1. Chapel, i fell asleep and didn't get caught. AWESOME. (Y) Miss Lim was behind us as usual, and the funny part is while we're going to stand up for benediction. SAN spotted the guy in front of us. Hehe. We saw his boxers/underwear. Hanxue told Miss Lim and those who notice as in my row lah. We started laughing but not really loud. Till Miss Lim told hanxue to tell him about it. And i really laugh effing loud cause she's so straight-forward. And his face like a blush only. Like bully sia, but ohwell. :D

2. After school, Had Birthday celebration at canteen. Chocolate cake, superb (Y) After that had an argument outside school with x and the whoever, cause gosh, Both super KP. Not really lah, Felt pretty sad for x. He's so innocent but he got screamed by me for nothing. And poor whoever, he got beaten up for nothing also. NOT BY ME. I'm not that violent. :D This argument last kinda long cause it happen that we still talked over the phone once i'm home. But i think now okay already :)

My current twitter rants, is about someone. I've no idea why i'm giving him such cold replies. I even ignored him right now. I've no idea what i'm doing. I'm sorry. :( Maybe it's just i think we got close to suddenly and i think everything need to slow down a little. I don't want a relationship going hair-wire again. :( & About the whoever that i fell for, he's like sec2 lah. Okay lah. Don't say i'm pedo but i'm in love with his blur look. But i know i never had a chance, so i'm slowly giving up. But chew told me not too, but i am still going too. :) 

Gosh, i went to read her blog, but you know, i'm not going to say her back or blog about her because as SHE say, she want me to be more mature right? Alright then, i don't want to quarrel with girls younger than me, you can say a lot of stuffs about me right now and i wouldn't say anything at all, MAYBE till you go overboard i would :) But you know, Karma will strike you one day :) 

Goodbye loves, I love you guys so much. I bet she will bitch about me saying i want to act like a victim~ & I'm so honoured of being on her blog. JOKING LA. Meeting Sean Chua tomorrow for dinner. Happygirl96. :D Finally can see him after like months and years. It might be awkward but i bet we could be as close as how we was last time.